Sunday, June 3, 2007

Egypt Trip Cut Short

We awoke the next morning eager to see the only surviving Ancient Wonder of the World in the form of the Gaza Pyramids located roughly 40 minutes outside of Cairo. After a quick breakfast of cereal and strawberry juice, we arrived at the hotel lobby, bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, at 7:30 am. Our guide turned out to be a chatty, young, heavyset woman with bright green eyeshadow and sparkling glitter on her face (a stark contrast to the appearance of most of the Egyptian women we had seen covered from head to toe in sober shades of brown and black). Her proposed itinerary included the step pyramid at Sakkara, the Ramses II museum at Memphis and the three pyramids and Sphinx at Giza. She also offered to take us to a “carpet school” (a codename for carpet stores), which we quickly struck from the agenda. The day turned out to be distinctive. We began by appreciating from outside the earliest attempt to construct a pyramid tomb (in stepwise form) at Sakkara before going inside to inspect the hieroglyphics. We then drove ten minutes to the rather unimpressive ancient city of Memphis – formerly Egypt’s capital – to observe a large horizontal Ramses II statue and a crude, miniature Sphinx. From Memphis, we drove to Giza to see the much-anticipated and most-renowned of Egypt’s tourist sites with our own eyes. Throughout, we were forced to fend off the advances of aggressive hawkers accosting us with mispronounced shouts of the Indian film star (this would be akin to Vik roaming the streets of Paris shouting “Gerald Depardieu” to get the attention of onlookers, a move he apppears to be contemplating down the road). Even though we knew that Giza was not remotely situated in a far-off desert, we still were not prepared for the pyramids to rise up from behind a street light in the middle of an unremarkable tourist strip. We soon made our way to the three stately Giza pyramids (one of which – the Great Pyramid – we crawled inside as one of the 250 visitors allowed to access the king’s burial chamber), a small museum housing a wooden boat excavated at the pyramids’ base and the iconic Sphinx. Unfortunately, our experience was marred by our subpar guide, who, after chatting amiably with us for a few minutes, devoted most of her attention to gossiping with the driver in Arabic or to devouring her arsenal of falafel wraps. We never managed to regain her attention, as she seemed wholly uninterested in fulfilling her official duties or providing any context for our experience. Upon arriving in Gaza, we were stunned by her refusal to get out of the air-conditioned van. Instead, she offered a hasty bare-bones overview of the site from her perch before sending us into the late morning sun to buy our own tickets. Meanwhile, every other guide we saw in the vicinity was alongside his or her charges, snapping their pictures in front of the monuments or pointing out relevant firsthand. We did our best to keep our so-called guide from spoiling our experience, mainly by reading from our guidebook or eavesdropping on other guides’ explanations. When she sauntered off before noon – leaving the driver to escort us to lunch – we finally lost our patience. Given that we had found this guide through an upscale hotel’s in-house travel agency, we worried greatly about the service quality for the next two weeks of our trip. Fuming, we scarfed down an Indian lunch at the nearby Mena Oberoi hotel overlooking the pyramids while strategizing about our recourse. When we eventually returned to our hotel, we lodged our complaints with the General Manager’s assistant, who also attempted to locate an alternate travel agency on our behalf. Meanwhile, we logged back online, only to once again find that we could not book plane tickets or Nile cruise berths without going through a travel agent. Through our own accord, we identified appropriate flights and a suitable cruise operator receiving favorable feedback online. We then forwarded the details to two separate hotel staffmember intermediaries to pursue on our behalf with two different reputable travel agents. Realizing that we would be stuck in Cairo until the travel agents could confirm onward details, we made arrangements with a second travel agency for a day trip to Alexandria for the following day. With any luck, we would be making our way up the river Nile in two days. Unfortunately, things did not go nearly as smoothly as planned. Our first sense of the impending challenges occurred that evening when a third travel agency came back with a quote much higher than we expected. Muffling his protests over the sizeable cost to pacify his increasingly-agitated wife, Vik attempted to make payment via credit card. When the travel agent demanded complete payment in cash (for multiple thousands of dollars), Vik bid him farewell. The following morning, the owner of the second travel agency met us in person to revisit each step of our intended itinerary. Disappointed that no progress had been made on the travel plans, we patiently re-explained every last detail. With assurances that everything would be taken care of, we left for our day trip to Alexandria, located three hours northwest on the northern Mediterranean coast. Alexandria proved to be an interesting excursion, and included visits to the city’s Roman-era catacombs, Pompey’s Pillar, the gorgeous new library and the Mediterranean-facing citadel. Our guide (an Egyptian Derek Jeter-lookalike) started off on a strong note, providing us with a helpful overview of Egyptian history and buoying our spirits with the thought that this day would go better than its predecessor. We were heartened that our guide actually alighted from the van and accompanied us to all of the sites. Unfortunately, our high hopes would soon be dashed. It soon became clear that our guide was handling us and taking advantage of our good faith. Our lunch tab was mysteriously inflated to twice the normal cost (suggesting that we paid for the meals of our guide and driver without prior consent). Some hours later, the cheap falafel stand we wanted to stop at for dinner was mysteriously inaccessible until Kaberi found it on her map located smack dab in the city’s conspicuous central plaza. The final straw for both of us, and cementing Vik’s disdain for Derek Jeter (both the original and the look-alike) occurred while we waited for tickets outside the Alexandria Library. After Vik had the gall to say that Egypt struck him as a tolerant society, the guide gave us a stinging, condescending, 30-minute lecture on the aggressive, expansionist aims of Israel. When we returned to our hotel that evening, we found that the second travel agency had created its own itinerary, keeping us Cairo for an additional three nights and booking us on its preferred cruise operator (one that didn’t show up on any Google or TripAdvisor searches). Adding insult to injury, the cost for the trip exceeded the original estimate by a factor of three. Disgusted and at the end of his rope, Vik made the executive decision to pull the proverbial rip code. He called United and changed our ticket to leave Egypt the very next day, shortening our two-week trip by ten days. In a last ditch attempt to salvage her trip, Kaberi searched online for any reasonable option. When none appeared, she was forced to go along with the decision to leave early, albeit with heavy heart. Kaberi holds out hope for a future return to the world’s oldest tourist destination and the enchanted land of Cleopatra, Nefertiti and Ramses II. Apparently, conventional wisdom suggests that Egypt is best discovered and appreciated through an all-inclusive guided tour.